Yoga for Trauma

Disclaimer: I am not a professional yoga instructor. I am a beginner. The references to yoga here are purely(well mostly) a skeleton for the story.  Also, trigger warning: sexual assault, suicidal ideation. I stand upright, feet together at the top of my mat, raising my hands towards the sky. The sky is blue. I'd like …

Random Thoughts

I have been slacking on my weekly Bikozulu doses. Slacking on my art. Slacking on my yoga. Slacking on my 1500 jump ropes a day. Slacking on my face beats. Slacking on doing laundry. Slacking on exfoliating my face and my feet. Slacking on reading books and blogs. Slacking, slacking, slacking... Slacking on my writing. …

The Girl in The Bar

It’s Thursday night. You sit in the far corner of the bar, slowly sipping your cocktail. The bar is half-full because you know what they say: Thursday is the new Friday. The DJ is obediently playing afrobeats and gengetone, seducing the weekend to life in the lazy bodies of the patrons. Some of them are …

Kasyoki wa Mitumba

I want a tattoo.   I am currently listening to “Kasyoki wa Mitumba” by Serro on repeat. The soft version, of course. The slow one where she deliberately enunciates each word and I can hear every guitar chord. The one where her voice sounds like honey, flowing, taking time to coat every inch of the …

Fundi

I was trying on a dress, looking at myself in the mirror, turning, lifting, swishing, fitting, straightening, crunching up. I straightened it and swept my eyes over my reflection, bunched it tighter around my waist, and thought, “Nikishikiwa hapa kwa waist itakuwa poa.” I gasped.  I sounded exactly like my mother. All my life, my …

You.

You. You want to take up space everywhere. You come over without any specific purpose, let yourself in, ask me a few stupid questions. I answer them as quickly as possible. You take a seat. Who told you to? You tell me things and ask me things. Have you noticed I haven’t left my bed …

Baby

My love, I will take one look at you the first time I see you and fall madly in love with you. That moment right there, feeling your little fingers wrapped around my index finger, watching you squirm around, little eyes closed, creating an illusion of peace, that will be the beginning of this madness …

20 Years, 20 Lessons

My mother is a superhero. Over Friendsgiving dinner, my classmates went around the table and 90% of us said the person they were most thankful for was their mother, I included. I have been thinking about it and I realize that my life would be very different without her. That lady moves mountains, she has …

Lines…

You wake up and she is gone. Bright sunlight is struggling to spill into your room through the partially closed blinds. You check your phone, it’s 8 a.m. Of course she is gone. She never stays. Your head sinks back into the pillow. You move your left leg and you feel the soreness where your …

Distract him.

He is easy to distract. Watch him. Observe his passions. He loves to talk about himself. He is obsessed with his new dog. "How are you?" he asks, admiring the dog painting at the front of the restaurant. "What's your dog's name again?" And he forgets. Starts rambling about his dog. He is easy to …